I could've done better!

Went for an interview yesterday. Although it went okay but it's not great and not as I had expected. Aiyak I can't get it out of my mind. They're looking for someone who's familiar with the open source technology, who posses excellent self-management, who's able to voice out opinions and so on.

I think I've passed the technical questions, though not with flying colors (isk!).... It's the non-technical questions that really holding me down. I knew I had better answers but didn't say it. Why? Why? WHY??!! I want the job so bad I think it's a sin. I have no problems whatsoever voicing out but why didn't I say anything about the big mapping project I was put in charge on? That's a big management point there. Haiya! Intense moments like job interviews make me loose my cool sometimes. Why? Why? Tell me why?! Why cant I answer a simple question like "What do you really want to do in IT?" Of course I want to get my hands dirty on everything on application development. Be it on Windows or Linux platform. Duh! I looked like I didn't have a goal when actually I did. Well I do. If only I got a second chance.

I had so many questions the night before but when they asked me about it yesterday all I could come out was do they provide medical benefits to their employees. How dumb is that? Oh my god. I was genuinely really interested in what they do. I wanted to know what is the technology or architecture behind their service they're providing. How they delegate the tasks to the staff and so on. Haiya! What has gotten into me la. I feel so slow right now. I want that job so bad. I could've done better!

Then again let's just not think about it and concentrate on task at hand. My deadline is coming real close now. Erk! Help!!!!

Update: OK done some damage control. Emailed them a thank you note and said some things to amend things... Anyway, it's done. All I need to do now is follow ups and then let fate decide. Eventhough fingers are crossed, I'm sure if a door closes, another opens. I'll wait for few days and if the response is negative I'm going to continue to look elsewhere.