Monday, August 29, 2005

A Birthday Card!

For My Daughter
Where Did The Years Go?

It seems like I just turned around for a moment,
and in a split second you grew!
A baby, a toddler, a youngster at school
have turned all at once into you...

Yet, dozens of memories crowd into my mind
of your wonderful, growing-up years-
of mischief, adventures, decisions, and dreams,
of laughter and, yes, a few tears...

The first day I held you and counted your toes,
I felt prouder than ever before,
without knowing then all the reason you'd give me
to love you a million times more.

Happy Birthday

Friday, August 26, 2005


Why is it so hard to let go???? It was difficult then. It still is now but less. It was kinda abrupt and I still have the tinglings when I think of him. Shit. It's been 7 months!

I know I made some mistakes and I was aware of it but before I could make it all up, it was all over. Sadly I wasn't given any chance to prove myself.

The mistakes:
1. I had (have) some troubles with expressing my feelings aloud.
2. I couldn't cope with too much stress when I started working, hence affecting the people I loved around me for a while
3. I counted too much on my family's opinion

So, there. I'm never going to be perfect. But by God, if I ever, ever, EVER in a relationship again, I will not f*** it up. This I promise you.

Book Talk

Current read: Band of brothers: E Company, 506th Regiment, 101st Airborne from Normandy to Hitler's Eagle's Nest
I'm enjoying it tremendously.

I've read Harry Potter 6 and found it so-so. I prefer HP previous books. They were more entertaining.

I've also read this and this out ouf curiosity and my newfound love of chicklit.

All these accomplished within this past 2 months! I've surprised myself. Maybe I'm at the 'books' phase in my life now. The 4 books I've ordered online arrived home safely:
1. Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
2. Sam's Letters to Jennifer by James Patterson
3. Chinese Cinderella : The True Story of an Unwanted Daughter by Adeline Yen Mah
4. Band of brothers: E Company, 506th Regiment, 101st Airborne from Normandy to Hitler's Eagle's Nest by none other than Stephen E. Ambrose

They were on my wanted list. Looks like the phase is going to stay for a while.

Hmm... what started as a harmless little effort has turned out to be a habit these days for me. I started reading small thin little books around 2 years ago and now look at where it has lead me to! People, turn off your tv and go grab a book. Start with an easy book - be it children's or whatever. Once you've finished it (and enjoyed it), you'd be motivated to try more serious thicker books. It happened to me so why not you.

Literate yourself.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Reminiscing and "I do"

Last Sunday I went into the trouble going to Banting to see my childhood friends celebrated as husband and wife. The reception was so good, it's supposed to be along the beach but only pokok bakau can be seen as far as my sight went that day...hehe... I loved the wind. Something about beaches really get me going.

Amrah + Abu + I went to the primary school together, although Am came in late in the picture in standard 5. Abu came in... oh I don't remember.... standard 2??? I had been in Banting since I was 6. But Am + I went to same high school, Abu went out to South Africa. Even he was not around, we still received news of him through his family. Some years later, Am went to UM and I USM. Abu was still abroad. My family moved to Shah Alam, Am's to Baling, Kedah - leaving Abu's still in Banting. I didn't hear anything of Abu again. All of the sudden, I heard Abu + Am got engaged but that wasn't made public to friends. I found out about it through my mom when she visited Abu's dad in hospital (car accident) and at his house again afterwards. Oh yeah I was pissed off since I've known them practically my whole life. And Am + I have been in contact. But then I realized that maybe we were not so close anymore to be receiving news like that....

Anyway, it took me over an hour from Shah Alam to get there. The road was fine except for minor bumps here and there. Minor as it sounds but my precious kancil won't survive it in little over a month! Kancil...what do you expect. Needs all the extra care it can get.

I wasn't alone. I have Ammar and Anuar (friends, don't get any ideas please) to keep me company. We arrived early. I was hoping to see Am before the perarakan + kompang + crowd + flashes of camera + etc. Also I was hoping that Abu would recognize me after all these years - we were neighbours once and his family was a close family friend of mine. I saw his brother running around helping out but sadly even though he walked past me so many times he didn't know who the hell I was. I kinda expected that since we didn't spend so much time together then. I was also looking to meet Khatijah but then I didn't know how she looked like now. I found someone who looked peculiarly like Abu's mom but decided not to say hi since she was attending the guest at the makan table.

I didn't know where Amrah was (Ammar was making faces...hahaha!!). So I had to make them wait. After all, I held the car keys.

Not until later all my former primary school's friends popping up. Some I didn't have the slightest idea who they were. Some looked familiar but couldn't remember the names. Azhar!! I remember you now. You've grown so tall!!! Erk... last time in standard 6 you were this tiny cute little thing with sepet eyes. And then all my former high school friends showed up.

Ame was there too with her mom. I was SO GLAD to see her since I missed her wedding - I still have the most uncomfortable feeling in the world for that. Now she's another story.

After catching up they decided to go to see Am in some house I did not know. I made Ammar and Anuar followed... *evil laughs*...

So I saw the bride and groom in cream colored baju pengantin. They look so good together. People there was so wanted to salam her and tell her how beautiful she looked (she was!). They were about to go with the kompang team so I didn' t want to make her nervous or panic or things like that so I kept quiet and watched from the side. Just about when the kompang theme started the chants and everything to start the walk, Am came through the people in front of me and hugged me and a few people around me. Neddless to say I was touched.

Then she got back to Abu's side and I saw Abu looking at me. I couldn't help smiling thinking he must've been shocked to see me there... it was amusing. There I was, the girl who always needed a ride to school, and a ride back home back, in his dad's car. The girl who once lived next door. The girl who came to his house during raya all the time. The girl who threw a stone to his brother once while he looked on stunned, she foolishly thought was protecting baby Ammar (wonder if there's a scar because she made somewhere on his forehead bleed - didn't get to meet Umar up close - he was running around all over the place). And there he was, a grown man now, married to a good woman, and was obviously couldn't wait to live the rest of his life together with her. The couple was made in heaven. I gave a nod of assurance and good wishes from where I was standing and he gave one back; and smiled. It was a good feeling. What a better way to reconnect the bond of a long lost friendship. I'm so glad our paths crossed. And I'm lucky to have mine crossed with these wonderful people's.

It was a good Sunday. On our way back, we stopped at the beach and eat ice creams and found Wawa and her fiance there! What a nice surprise. Now that's another wedding in to look forward to. We chatted a little and waved goodbyes and parted.

Ammar and Anuar slept in the car on the way home. I was listening to the radio and the songs were oh so coincidently romantic. They fit so well with the theme of the day - wedding!

It was a good Sunday.

Friday, August 19, 2005


Amidst all this 'Love is in the air' thing around me, I was shocked to discover that one of my dearest friend delivered me one devastated news this morning. I'm so sorry that things didn't turn out well for her.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Amelia & Shaifol


I missed my childhood bestfriend's wedding!!! Urrgh!!! So I've asked her to mail me the wedding pics. The camera that snapped them surely didn't give the couple any juctice. Those were amateurs I'm sure so I did a little touch ups. I know she certainly looked more beautiful that day with her prince charming in her arms.

My other childhood friends are getting married to each other this weekend. Here's wishing all the best to both of them.

One last look at the couple, a testament to both of them: when you're in love, it shows.



Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Bad Day

by Daniel Powter

Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
And I don't need no carryin' on

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on

You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day

Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong

So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Seriously shit happens. But what's good about it is that its nature is momentary. What you gotta do is pull yourself together and stand back up again. To those who have hit all time low, come on... Let's start with a smile shall we?

p/s: I love the video clips!!!!

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Saturday, August 6, 2005

Ze Uro Nglish - reil sensibl riten styl

The Euro English

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

- got from some forwarded email

Tuesday, August 2, 2005


Yesterday I went looking for my Lolita and guess what I've found out? They've stopped the production altogether! erk. This can't be real.


This will be the end of me.

Doesn't make sense though. Why they stop? I couldn't find anything on the net so I'm in such a pain right now.